Understanding Grief 

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When faced with a loss, the foundation of our lives can feel shattered.  There is a sense of confusion, disorientation and inability to think clearly. Life all of a sudden seems cloudy.  You don't know what to do, or where to turn.  This is a natural response to the shock of loss, but is none the less a scary place to find ourselves.  Grief can be defined in many different ways, and in fact, it is important that we all define our grief for us.  It just looks different for everyone.  Grief can be defined as anticipatory, acute, complicated/prolonged and disenfranchised.  But make no mistake - there are no predefined, expected or required "stages" of grief.  Grief is messy, hard and is in no way linear -it goes up, down, back and forth.  And, in time, it does become integrated into our lives.   More information on some different types of grief can be found here. 

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As resilient beings, we are naturally wired to adapt to loss, and integrate our grief into our life, moving into a space that forges a new way of being and living without our loved one, while always maintaining a sense of connection.  Our lives are forever changed when a loved one dies, and somehow we find our way to restoration.    

 

And it is in finding our way to restoration that we can be faced with challenges.  We need good, solid support systems to help us grieve.  We need to reconcile all of the "would have, should have and could have" thoughts.   We need to heal.  We need to find a way, or make one. 

 

If you are struggling with your grief, please reach out for help.  Together we will find, or make, a way to healing.